much like aunt josephine from lemony snicket's a series of unfortunate events, i have an irrational fear of realtors. we have one coming to look at ours this friday. :S i think this disturbs me most because we have so much left to finish and not enough time to do it. however, i hate the idea of opening up my home to someone that i don't know, who i wouldn't otherwise associate with, and who will be judging me based on numerous superficial things. it's weird. i've never done well with popularity contests. you either like me or you don't. and i'm usually okay with that. save the exception of one college professor that i tried so hard to befriend, and the harder i tried, the more i was pushed away. i don't take this too personally, though, either. i wasn't the only one whose love and affection was rejected. and quite frankly, i feel as though it is their loss and not mine. that's either a really healthy way of seeing things, or i'm delusional and too wrapped up in myself sarah silverman style. but i guess i'm okay with that, too. ;) i wish we had the money to call someone in to do the work for us, but we've learned so much renovating on our own. i only hope that our transformations will wow the realtor this friday as much as they seem to wow us. dear, sweet reader, i ask nothing but good vibes from you while we go through this scary, uncharted territory in our home owner's experience. eek!

Nolite te bastardes carborundorum.

so i've felt pretty puny these past few days. i took advantage of this on friday to delve into a long awaited book, the handmaid's tale by margaret atwood. i would like to think that i have more vocabulary than what i am about to use to sum up this novel, but it was fucking amazing! i've read some pretty kick-ass books in my time, but i ate this up in virtually a day. it was heaven. i curled up on our futon with my snuggly little dog and just read ALL day (and napped). i'm not sure how i made it through 3 years of women's studies without having come across this text, but i am so glad that i found it at my local used book store for only 75 cents. i've now moved on to the bell jar, which i am eating up equally as quickly. i think perhaps i mis-majored and should have gone into english lit. or women's lit. really i just like reading anything that moves me. the handmaid's tale left me curious, angry, and somewhat hopeful--which is what any good book should be able to do--otherwise, what's the point?!? i used to think when i was younger that i, too, would like to write, but i have come to terms with the fact that i am destined to read and enjoy what others have so carefully crafted. atwood gave me a giggle with her *subtle* "Pen Is Envy" line as well. finding a good book is like adding a new friend to your life. it feels like such an accomplishment to have discovered it, spent time with it, and then to put it away for safe-keeping. we cut our cable subscription over 3 years ago and have lived without tv...i mean, we still own a tv. we watch documentaries and dvd's, but we don't watch all the mindless (and expensive) CRAP that is on tv, and i can safely say that i don't miss it. i love curling up on the couch with a good read and being alone with my thoughts as opposed to putting up with the incessant commercials, obnoxious sounds and bad jokes that are all over the place. i know people who have satellite and cable with 600+ channels that probably pay out the wazoo for their service, and there is rarely anything worthwhile on. sure, there's the occasional film, or a good documentary, but with netflix or the internet, your money's better spent on those services as opposed to crap tv. all this, just to say, i spent a helluva weekend with atwood and am looking forward to my week with plath. hooray books!

V-O-M-I-T (sung to the tune of "Bingo was his name-O"

it's been a rough couple of days. i got a migraine tuesday and i woke up in the middle of the night wednesday with what can either be classified as the ol' gastrointestinal bug or food poisoning. :( to make matters worse, i also had to spend the night mopping up the bathroom floor, and am currently washing all of the bathmats. good times. on the bright side, i got up this morning only to find that i had started my period. while i would normally be disgruntled by this, i recently ordered the diva cup (http://www.divacup.com/)and was able to put it to use for the first time, so i was pleased. it quelled my worries that it would be gross, uncomfortable, or just plain weird. it was pretty darned easy, and despite the fact that i still feel like crap, i feel pretty good for just having had some sort of bug AND my period. i'm digging the fact that i'm environmentally friendly at a very basic level. what tickles me even more is that i bought the correct size unlike my good friend who found one at whole foods the other day. she's 23. she bought size 2 which is for women 30 or over or who have given birth. she's obviously not 30, and no, she's never had kids. so...while i'm gloating at my new eco-friendly purchase, she has her's on the shelf for the next 7 years. hey, at least she's prepared! as for myself, i'm off to test out the BRAT (bananas, rice, applesauce, toast) diet and get back on track for the weekend and weeks to come.

pissed at PETA

first of all, don't spaz out over what i had intended to be today's blog photo: it's just some harmless fruits and veggies! http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:26908 and i love my veggies, but i can't say the same about PETA. as many of you may know, PETA has a long history of objectifying women, but i hadn't looked into it too much until today. i received an e-mail thanking me for requesting the free PETA veggie starter kit (i love free shit, okay?!) and also e-viting me to participate in the PETA sexiest vegetarian next door contest. http://sexyvegnextdoor2010.peta.org/PastWinners.aspx at first i thought this might be a joke, or at least something clever. not so. it's just beefy man-hunks and wretchedly skinny praying mantis women oiled up and scantily clad. so i responded to PETA's e-mail with the following:

Subject: PETA Complaint

To Whom It May Concern:

There are many things I like about PETA's promotion of vegetarianism and creating a more animal friendly world. However, I have come to find that many of the advertisements used by your organization display blatant sexism and objectification of the human body. If we are to be kinder to our animal brethren, then perhaps a good step in that direction would be by promoting a healthier image of the human body. By doing so, this would not promote health or well-being by current societal standards of "beauty" and "sexiness" as is the case with the PETA Sexiest Vegetarian Next Door Contest. Many vegetarians are quite content with their bodies no matter how they look, and putting the body on display to be judged by others makes us no better than animals for sale at livestock show. Frankly, I am disappointed by this contest as well as some of PETA's previous ad campaigns objectifying the human body. Shape up, PETA! Try a contest that tests vegetarian creativity or humor as opposed to something that aligns itself with the current white, male-dominant patriarchal oppression.

Sincerely,

etudiante.enragee (you thought i was going to give the game away, there for a minute, didn't you?) ha!

i just can't stand the constant obejectification of not only the female body (although it is much more readily used, just check out some of PETA's ad photos!!!) but the human body all together. now i probably sound like a prude. and i'm sure the person who reads my e-mail at PETA will think i'm a fatty; both are beside the point. the point is: yes, the human body is a beautiful thing, but why should we be rewarded for buying into the current myths about what is beautiful and appealing? argh. i wanna see some pics of meaty women in that case--and i don't mean that size 12 model that they referred to as "plus sized" at the fashion show this past week!!! http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=123604722&ps=cprs
all this unhealthy body image business is driving me crazy! it makes me want to submit a photo of myself to PETA in a ski suit or peeking out of the shower while munching on a carrot stick.

let's reevaluate sex and beauty and fight the powers that be!

you say ca-nah-dah, i say ca-nuh-duh

there's been a lot of talk over the past few months about france's president sarkozy wanting to ban the burqua. http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/wed-july-1-2009/burka-ban
but until now, it seemed like idle threats. i suppose we should have known better seeing as how sarko is a man who, for better or worse, gets things done. nothing has been done...yet. however, the report is under review and may be passed into law if enough supporters are willing to back it.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=122981366
in reading Anushay Hossain's essay on NPR, i couldn't agree more with her statement that sarko's woman-empowered lingo simply attempts to cover up the fact that he, too, is trying to exercise patriarchal power over a female minority.
i'm a feminist. i've got a degree in women's studies. i wrote a thesis on gender roles; but i don't pretend to have answers to questions such as these. i think it's pretentious and very "western do-gooder" of us to tell an entire culture of people why we think they are wrong and we are right. this is one of those battles that quickly becomes a pot-ay-to/po-tah-to war. no woman should be forced to do something by the culture or government in which she lives. WOMAN'S CHOICE is key in many of these issues. i hate breast implants. i think they're ugly and unsafe; i also think that many women get them for all the wrong reasons...but lo and behold, if a woman decides freely that bigger knockers are going to improve her quality of life, may she knock herself out to get them. the same goes for the veil, burqua, niquab, and the women who CHOOSE to wear them: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EoN0o9Sg6QA
i hate to ride the fence on this issue, but i can't say that david beckham forced posh to get those breasts augmented any more than i can say that every woman who wears the symbol of her muslim beliefs is being forced to do so. i think at the root of many of these problems is a society that devalues women's worth as well as promoting standards that reinforce women as the property of men. it's not just islam--look at fundamental christians!!! i've got a real soft spot for the muslims of the world right now. between all this burqua business, consistently being targeted as terrorists, and now with the swiss on their case, (http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/30/world/europe/30swiss.html) they have become to the 2000's what the communists represented during the cold war...hey wait! americans still don't like communists. well, you get my point. i don't think it is through governmental bans that we will make progress in global muslim relations. no one would like it if a ban were passed with regard to christian steeples (except perhaps the jehova's witnesses) nor would they like it if we tried to ban sweatpants and ugg boots. all i'm saying is that if everyone tried to pass laws about people they hated, we'd all have to sit at home naked. that would get boring and cold pretty darned quick. lay off the layered ladies, unless of course you are asked to be a good western savior--in which case, onward christian soldiers!